Tuesday, June 28, 2011

I am a supermom but not a perfect mom

Yes, i am supermom. I can cook, do the laundry, mop, iron, feed, on top of taking care of 2 very young kids-all on my own. I get a sick sense of satisfaction from being able to accomplish my daily chores. Perhaps that's why i stubbornly refuse any help, no not even a part time maid.

Yet im not perfect. There's alot of guilt and i can't quite keep my temper in check. You'll find me yelling, screaming, scolding, nagging at sonshine boy for very minor things. That poor boy. As for the girl, she's being ignored (not by choice) and left to wail her lungs out (specifically in the car when im driving to send/pick the boy up from school). It's really hard, while im attending to one, i neglect the other. At times, the day ends with me feeling like i didn't satisfy any of their needs/wants. That's when Mr guilt comes knocking at my door. For both of them, i worry my erratic behavior will affect their emotional well being.

That said, i am really blessed that sonshine boy is, well, a sunshine. Despite all that verbal bashing from me, he remains very cheerful and upbeat. He still shines his very wide and bright smile at us each day. He rarely, actually never, throw any tantrum. If there's any crying from him, it's because of me. :( I caused it. Although i can't quite give me all my attention, he's still happy with whatever i can offer him.  He doesn't mind getting the tired, moody mummy, as long as mummy is next to him, he's happy. Still, i don't want to take advantage of that, i think it'll not be healthy for him in the long run.

On a positive note, things have improved. Im not as snappy as before. Nowadays, i am able to keep my cool, of course there are down moments. All of us are getting the momentum, we seem to know our places now. Well, during the school holiday at least. Now that school has re-opened we are all thrown into a new routine once again. Chub chub has to get use to travelling up and down to send/pick big brother up, big brother well... has to return back to his old routine. As for me, i can relax a little since i don't have to cook the boy's lunch....but i've to get use to the girl's horrible wailing in the car.

I know things will get better with each passing day. We will get through this! w i


  1. Every night, as I hug my little ones in my arms and sleep, I ask myself, 'Have I been a good parent today'? And on most of the days, I do not pass this test! There would be moments, where I would been rude or unfair in my words or deeds. I don't believe in the concept of  'super-moms', but I do believe that children are special gifts from God and it is privilege to have them with us. This thought helps me realize the mistakes that I made today, and helps me to be a better parent tomorrow. 

  2. I can imagine tht since I'm in your shoes too! Frankly, 2 kids are pretty handy for a dedicated mom like you, guilt and regret are inevitable... all the best!

    Treat everyday like no tmw, perhaps it helps to calm down the temperament.:)

  3. I totally understand what you mean. LOL. This guilt thing is something that hits me hard many times. Many times in a single day!

    Give yourself and your family some time to get adjusted to the new routine. Definitely, it WILL get better!!!


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