Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Some serious thoughts...

I shared my blog with a few friends and uploaded a video on Facebook showing N reading a book. While i received compliments, i also realised a couple of my mother friends felt guilty and lousy after reading and watching my internet spaces. They began to feel like they are not doing enough for their kids. :(

And that is exactly why i kept my blog anonymous and i didn't tell all my friends about my blog (nor what i do with N at home). Well if you are one of those moms, this is address to you.

I admit, N cognitive skills are more advance then some of peers- but that's really just about it. There you are fretting how far behind your 3 year old (academically) is from mine, but here i am worrying about how far my 3 year old is lagging behind in terms of his speech and social developments. You feel lousy when you read my blog about how fast N is learning, i feel lousy when i read your updates on facebook about how your child say something that throws you off your chair or when i see your child conversing so well with adults (something i rarely experience). So there, we are on par.

I don't know which is better. To have a child with average developments or one who is cognitively strong but poor in the remaining areas. Sometimes i think its the former, because you know your child is right on target on his milestones & really, you have nothing to worry about.

What i am saying is, i set up this blog to journal down only N's learning. So what you read here is really only one side of the story, there are areas where N needs alot of improvements. It just so happens that N learns well academically.

If his interest was in Arts, this blog would be about the crafts we do at home. If its about music, you bet there will be lots of musical notes on this blog. Your child has a different talent from mine, nurture her strengths instead of keeping your eyes on the strengths of other children (that's what i tell myself too!).

So please, don't let me or N or this blog make you feel any lesser as a mother because i know that feeling and its not nice. Like i told a friend, focus on your child's improvements and not on how far he is from his peers. That's how i keep myself positive with N's speech and social developments.


  1. I totally understand what you are talking about. But I must say I am so encouraged by your sharings. Thank you!

  2. awww, thanks for your encouragement. I just want my blog to give others ideas rather than make them depressed...that's the last thing i want to do. :( i feel so bad.

  3. Yes, I really got pushed on to work on from your blog.

  4. I too am inspired/encouraged! I mean, you've not been gloating etc and have been open about sharing about the difficulties as well... I guess every kid is different, and each learns and picks up life skills at different stages, all of us are just doing what we can to nurture them! :)


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